Tag: drugs
How Sol Trujillo has probably started the countdown to WW3
by anirudhasher on Jun.19, 2009, under Not So General
I’m not too aware of why he said what he did but one believes that Sol Trujillo may single-handedly be responsible for the upcoming film World War 3 which is based on a real life story. “Australia is a racist and backward country” he said, it shocked a country and shook an entire continent. This reaction from the ex-CEO of Australian Telecommunication giant Telstra may or may not have been caused by Kevin Rudd’s comment when asked about the CEO leaving quitting his post.
What did ol’ Kev do? What else? He said “Adios!” who might even deny knowing that Sol has Mexican roots. Good thing Ruddy didn’t add an “Amigos’ after his drink worthy comment.
Agreed so the man took $35 million dollars from the host country he was living and working in, but was it really necessary to call these people “Racist”.
I suppose it woke something up in the bogans who realised that “aliens” were arriving in boatloads and taking up their jobs which was a direct cause to the reduction in their free (alcohol) money from the Australian Government.
Thus started a search for easy targets. Hmm… who should drunk Aussies decide to target? Who else? Indians, (as Aussies who beat up some Chinese 4 years ago had all been murdered by the Chinese Triad mafia). Who’s desperate for money, work their way through their education, often take up jobs through the night and come from the land of Gandhi? Indians of course. Hell those mullets would mug an Indian horse if they saw one walking around on the streets after 11!
So Indian students start being attacked more and more, and as the attacks increase there are reports being sent to the mindless Indian News Media which love to broadcast anything, even if it looks like a monkey dressed in a thong and a push up bra!
The parents of all the Indian students in Australia along with the Indian news media bring to the attention of our beloved Puppet Prime Minister Manmohan Singh, what’s going down in the land down under. Who on the suggestion of his dear Italian mommy spoke to the controversial Ruddy himself… “Please stop hitting our students.” Manny pleaded. While in the land of Kangaroos some Indians stopped trams on the streets in Central Melbourne in protest. You’d be quite better off wearing a tshirt that says, “I hate Aussies!” and parading around CBD.
This caught the attention of Australian news like a cheetah catches a stuffed deer! Now bogan (Stupid and uneducated) caucasian thieves are roaming the streets targeting Indians who work till late. Faster way to get money? Sell a kidney, but whats the point if you’re kidney has been annihilated by heavy alcohol and drug abuse while staying at your Mum’s for the last 20years anyway?
As the world gets whacked by the economic death ray, lets hope racism doesn’t sting Indians and Aussies in the heart. Either way here’s a prophecy for you all-
If India doesn’t call back all it’s Indians in the next two years, I’ll change my name to Sol Trujillo! ¡Adios amigos, yo tengo uno tequila!
Disclaimer: The author(thats me) has many Australian friends and in no way is terming all Aussies as bogans. Infact I know alot of them who are very sweet and polite people and have confessed of being made to feel awkward and ashamed by the horrid acts of a few. If I didn’t love this country and the (nicer) majority of its people I wouldn’t be here in the first place. Also I cannot say that the people who were attacked had no hand in their own downfall, it is possible that they may have forgotten that “While in Australia, do as the Aussies do” and thus have brought it upon themselves. Though such thoughts remain as trivial speculation that’s to be decided by the victims themselves. ¡Adios!
©Anirudh Asher, 2009.
Why Guy Gangs Can but Shouldn’t Exist(on Twitter)
by anirudhasher on Jun.18, 2009, under Not So General
There’s a very interesting phenomena on Twitter right now, its that all like minded people and bots are congregating together to celebrate the similarities they share. Some of these collectives have pre-requisites that must be fulfilled before any person/bot is accepted as a member, and the last time I checked Charles Darwin’s 1809 New York best seller, “The Origin of Life”, it said that males humans could not be a part of this discovery! Male bots are gay anyway so it doesn’t matter.
Males of most (successful) species of animals are alpha, that means they don’t take no shit, that also means that we men will die alone without same sex friends at the end of our monogamic lives. This theory has been proven time and time again, it happened with KISS (the band, not the barrel of monkeys who painted their faces), Boyzone, Backstreet Boys, NSync last but not absolutely not the least Sonny n Cher. They all suffer from symptoms like heavy drug abuse, strong bouts of “head-swelling”, constant distortion of group formation and constipation from heavy opioid consumption. This is mother nature clearly nagging,” If you’re male and not macho, stop pissing here! It’s the Gene Pool for gods sake! Go find the kiddies pool, its the one that looks like a huge toilet bowl!”
One might think that the highly successful patchup of Indian Women online “Sunsilk Gang of Gurls” has been implemented onto twitter. But you’re clearly wrong,they’re actually the Justice League Girl Gang. As understood by many they discuss shoes, make-up, boys and other Weapons of Mass Delerium(for men). Massive psychological scarring and insomnia bear witness to the morbidity and the power of these WMD’s. This is a plausible explanation as it has been proven by a certain communications professor of mine that women are more social than men. Why not? We men like to be short and sweet, so what if we substitute monosyllabic sounds and grunts for sentences?
Commendations: Thanks to suddentwilight for the tip off on the dangerous behaviour of the Notorious “Girl Gang”, you are a brave girl!
(No sexist braincells were harmed while writing this article. To be taken with a pinch of salt, and if that doesnt help follow with tequila. Repeat as necessary for best results.)
Update: After being tracked down by members of the Girl Gang and being tortured and told to remove this post, I am now going to persist and post their twitter handles here!
If I missed anyone, Interpol will surely get them…….
©Anirudh Asher,2009